Jesus Christ Announces He’s Returned to Try Another Sandwich

BUFFALO, NEW YORK —  The Bible foretells that when the End Times are upon ...

Tennessee Democrats Considering a 48-Hour Waiting Period for Erections

NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE — In 2015, conservatives in Deep Red Tennesee seriously considered making the ...

5 Reasons You Should Not Vote for Bernie Sanders

Should you vote for Bernie Sanders? We have no clue. Seriously. We don’t. It’s ...

Trump Campaign Buys Hundreds of Thousands of Tiki Torches in Anticipation of Rally Crowd Sizes

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump’s re-election campaign issued a financial report today containing ...

President’s Rape Accuser Subpoenas McDonald’s for Trump’s DNA

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Advice columnist E. Jean Carroll is currently locked in a legal ...

Trump Whistleblower Hires Rand Paul’s Neighbor as Bodyguard

Today, Senator Rand Paul (R-Putin’s Payroll) had a question for the House impeachment managers ...

During Impeachment Q&A Cruz Asks: “Isn’t Trump As Innocent As My Wife Is Ugly?”

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The question of whether or not to call additional witnesses during ...

Barack Obama Narrated Audiobook Version of Explosive New Bolton Memoir

Former Ambassador and Trump national security adviser John Bolton’s new book, The Room Where It ...