Monday, October 2, 2023
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    Game of Thrones Producer Reveals Coffee Cup Will Sleep With Its Sister and Kill Scores in Next Episode

    Ever since it debuted, HBO’s epic series Game of Thrones has thrilled and enthralled audiences, almost always causing quite the day-after buzz about its episodes. As the series comes to an end, it seems the scrutiny and hubbub over the scenes depicted in each remaining episode only grows stronger. This morning was no exception.

    Last night’s episode featured all kinds of new drama, intrigue, and of course violence and sex, as the show’s audience has become well-acquainted to. However, perhaps overshadowing what happened in the plot lines of the episode last night, social media is buzzing about a mistake that the show’s creative team made during a crucial scene. Apparently someone on the set must’ve been drinking a coffee from Starbucks, because as fans quickly pointed out, the cup was clearly visible in a scene that takes place after last week’s episode that featured the Battle of Winterfell.

    While some fans have made some pretty hilarious memes about the gaffe, others have worried whether it shows a lack of concern for the show that’s now winding down its impressive eight season run. However, show producers announced today, in part because of the enormous online response the cup’s appearance created, that the placement of the cup was no mistake at all.

    “Anyone making the assumption that the coffee cup wasn’t placed there on purpose hasn’t been paying attention to this show’s rich history of weaving a tapestry of characters that come in and out of the story line as needed,” Cheryl Chertson, junior associate line grip producer on the show told us. “That cup is a character and has a name — Bill Starkbucks. And he’s going to play a central role in the final couple episodes.”

    According to Chertson, the show’s writers will waste no time in the remaining installments, and Starkbucks will be seen doing what enamored so many fans of other characters on the show.

    “That cup is going to bang his older sister, and it’s gonna kill so many people in really gruesome, explicit ways,” Chertson told us. “We’re pretty confident Bill Starkbucks is going to be a fan favorite once they see him giving it to his relative and murdering people.”

    While it was confirmed that the coffee cup is a real character, and it was confirmed that it will participate in standard Game of Thrones activities, there are still a lot of details about him being kept under tight wraps, Chertson said.

    “We weren’t even going to say anything at all, but the buzz just got too big,” Chertson said. “We didn’t want anyone thinking we’d made a mistake. We pay attention to every detail, pore over every scene to make sure they’re as perfect as they can be. So we’re going to keep the rest of Bill Starkbuck’s story arc secret, but suffice to say, the Iron Throne has a lot of room for a little coffee cup on it. Oops. I’ve said too much. Now they’re going to invoke the murder clause in my NDA, and it was nice knowing you all.”

    Services for Ms. Certson will be held some time after the series finale of Game of Thrones, later this month.

    Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook and Instagram, but not Twitter because he has a potty mouth.

    James Schlarmann
    James Schlarmann
    Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.